Game Over

Aww, spurs season over =( they played a good playoffs season though, especially against the hornets. i am pretty disappointed with their performance during these western finals though. my hate towards kobe bryant and the lakers continues to burn, kobe is still a ballhog and not deserving of MVP in my world. still think it should go to chris paul, paul pierce/kevin garnett, or tony parker ;D

whatever, it's all good. we'll get it next year, there's a dumb spurs "curse" that they can't repeat being champs, but just having it every other year. they got this!

hopefully though, spurs gets some trades in and get some more younger players =X

see ya later spurs! as for now...
GO CELTICS!

it's not the end

this memorial day weekend, i was shaken with some very shocking and unexpected events.

all i can say is, when you think things are bad, look for the light at the end of the tunnel. you're not gonna be stuck in that hole forever.

anger bursts

sometimes i believe i'm bipolar. well, a lot of people do, but forreal, i really think i am.

a lot of people like to mess with me. they like how i react to when they make fun of me or push my buttons, because really, i don't know how to handle that crap. then they go talking crazy smack to other people saying i'm crazy. wtf, you know i can hear you so why don't you say it to my face?

i usually have all this anger bubbled up inside of me, but it usually simmers down.

today was an exception.

my 5th period was driving me crazy. they like to make fun of me and shit and make fun of me 'cause i'm a spurs fan too. i had 5 people on me bashing on the spurs, and soon enough, i couldn't take it and my anger took control. i basically yelled at all those buttholes, cussed them out, and shut them up.

i basically left a bad impression on them. i bust out into tears, and got into my depressed mode. i'm tired of this shit people feed me.

and as i walked out of 5th period, i felt guilty for what i had just done, but i had a burning dislike towards them. but soon enough, i got over it. i didn't care anymore.

i'm continuing trying to keep my head up, keeping the thought that God will NEVER give me anything i can't go through, but it's a struggle. i really know it's making me emotionally stronger.

when i was small, the simplest things made me bawl. but as i grew older, i became tough emotionally. i became a jerk, i admit it. even my mom has told me that.

but really, i think everyone, including me, needs to watch what they say to people. the smallest remarks or comments can bring a shrill and stab to someone's heart. and you will never know it.

trust me.

BTW: i just love how this spurs-lakers series is causing HELLA drama between the fans, but whatevah, hahaha. it's all good, i don't really care =)

goodbye hornets, hello lakers

it was a tough series for the spurs in the western semifinals. they easily beat the suns, but when they faced hornets, it became a challenge. they haven't had to go to a game 7 and face elimination for a few years, and the last time they had to do that, they were eliminated by the Dallas Mavericks (who i hate also <3). i was impressed by the hornets, and i admit i was afraid that they would defeat my spurs. they had the potential to, but didn't quite make it. i had some doubt in the spurs, for at one point they were down 0-2. the series ended up with wins of 10+ points, but game 7 got me on my feet the most. the hornets caught up from a 10+ point lead to a 3 point one, but then lost it. i was literally sweating like hell, and my heart was racing so fast. i didn't want my spurs to lose! after walking around school, people telling me this was the day i was going to say goodbye to the spurs for the '07-'08 season, it feels good to have this proven wrong to them. i love my spurs.

props to chris paul, he's a freakin' boss. i think he would suit MVP better than kobe bryant.

Lakers, here we come!

three words.

" I love you. "

i've been thinking today, about those three little words. it's a powerful statement. as a catholic, we're expected to love one another unconditionally, no matter what. but with the wars, politics, drama, and differences we have in our life, where has that all that gone?

i myself try using those words a lot, but also, i myself feels awkward when others speak it to me. why? i really don't know. kind of like if a homeless person went up to you and said "i love you." awkward yes, so maybe there's this point we all need to reach before speaking it.

it can be pretty bitter to say those three words to someone and them giving you some other freaky response other than "i love you too!"

but forreal though, with all these issues going on with the world, where is the love? we need to spread it like butterrr! three little words can make someone's day, believe it. not only must we speak those words, but we need to live up to what we say.

" Those three words... are said too much... they're not enough. " -Snow Patrol, Chasing Cars

yeah, i don't know why i'm randomly writing about this, but yeah, just another part of my deep thinking.

i've also decided today i'm seriously going to look into the bible more and think about the meanings more. :)

open your eyes

yesterday was a good day. after my renewal of faith, i had decided to come back to yfc after a period of time i decided not to go and all that. right when i come back, i get a bunch of attitude and BS from people -- the reason why i had stopped going in the first place. i was truly angered with myself for choosing to come back, in hopes of everything being restored. guess not, so i decided to go home. i was overwhelmed, but with everything i learned from confirmation, i wasn't going to let it bring down my faith as it usually would. we always take him for granted, and let the stupidest and smallest things bring us away from him. i've learned. i've taken it in. this won't stop me.

i've been going through a series of problems this whole week, and i've been upset with myself on how i've been handling it, especially since i just came back from retreat and all. but i always think to myself.. you always think you're going through a bunch of crap, but seriously, someone else in the world has it worst than you do (thanks rio). it's true. so everytime i hit a problem nowadays, i suck it up and let it go. what kind of life doesn't have problems anyways.

i just finished reading a book about the Holocaust in english. it really pissed me off how Hitler thought germans had more authority over jews. Everyone is human. in that case, i seriously do not believe anyone has more authority than anyone else.

i can't sing, but maybe you can.
i am a leader, but maybe you're not.
i am a class officer, but maybe you're not.
i feel i have no talent whatsoever, but you do.
i do sports, but maybe you do better than me.
i may have ugly ass skin, but you probably have better skin than me.
i am a freshman, but maybe you're a sophomore/junior/senior.
i am a human, you are a human, we are equal.
if we are equal, no one is more superior than the other. Amen.

be not afraid

it's been almost a week since retreat and i really miss it. my faith was at it's lowest peak in life, and this retreat was brought it back through the roofs. i've been seriously living every day feeling better than i used to.

i've learned so much from retreat, about taking friends, family, and God for granted. the reason why we don't along with people or don't like them is because we always look at their flaws and differences. when we do that, we get too distracted from their true self. if we just accepted their differences, we'd all get along. family.. we need to learn to appreciate them, they've suffered a lot for us and they were the people who brought us to life. and most importantly... sometimes we take GOD for granted. just because we know He's always here no matter times we turn against Him and sin, we still need to appreciate him with every moment and keep our faith high.

i'm also really glad i got to get to know people i didn't talk to before! like we learned, once you get to know people you really do get to see their "inner masks". i will admit i was seriously intimidated of a few people, but then after getting to know them at retreat, i found out who they really were -- kind people =)

i kinda wish i was in a cabin with people i didn't know so i can bond with them you know? but then i ended up in a cabin of people i almost all knew, and it kinda pissed me off how our cabin was split in "cliques". but whatever, we still had fun. hahah, "i hate cliques."

although there may have been one mishap that kinda scarred the whole experience, everyone really learned from it. like robbie said, there's so no such thing as problems, but opportunities. everyone used that event as an opportunity to test ourselves with our honesty and conviction and everything. i'm really glad the whole class got through it and it ended with a positive solution.

this whole confirmation class has been rocky until we hit retreat. i didn't look forward to confirmation, i considered it worse than all my classes at school. i thought ed & liza were the most strict people i've known, but now, i totally understand them. this whole retreat, i began to think... what if i were in their shoes? they are like our parents, they place limits on it because they think it's for the best for us. i totally agree with them now.

this whole class is finally starting to grow into a true family, and it makes me sad that we only realize these things as our confirmation rapidly comes along. i really hope everything that comes in our path continues to stay positive and this bond doesn't break but remains to build strong. <3

Life is good. God is good. All the time. =)